I finally found some work! And it was so much easier than I expected. Woo hoo temp agencies! Next week I'm working at some weird official-sounding conference on Homeland Security. It sounds important, but I'm just going to sit outside and stuff goodie bags. Then direct people-traffic.

I'm directing the traffic of Homeland Security! If I don't tell them the right place to go, they could all get lost and confused and then Terror Level Orange.

Abrupt conclusion!